Selasa, 03 Juli 2012

After You Say No, It Is Rape

Posted on 01/11/2010

Many men’s definition of rape does not apply to their own behavior or that of their male friends. Some men, as well as women, honestly believe that men cannot control themselves when they are sexually aroused.

They believe the girl or the woman is responsible for both arousing and controlling the man. This is absolute rubbish. At any age, a man is perfectly able to control his sexual drive at any point, from first arousal to climax. But, the attitude that men are not responsible for their actions with women is not a new idea.

Many men young and old still have the fantasy that once they are aroused they have a right to have sex with a woman, regardless of her wants, desires, or needs.

Someone might say:
“If a woman gets in my Mercedes without wearing a bra, she’s asking for it!” Another man agreed, saying that any woman who goes up to a man’s apartment, or allows a man into her apartment, is saying she wants to have sex.

Such attitudes have been created and taught by fathers, grandfathers, and yes, even by mothers. Some women today still believe that it’s a woman’s job to control the man’s behavior, and that women just have to tolerate the assaults.

Rape is about power. Men rape to get power over women. These men often feel powerless in their lives, and so they look for a way to increase their sense of self worth by controlling and manipulating another “weaker” human being.

Of course, this is a flawed idea, and rape doesn’t give the rapist any lasting sense of power or self-worth, so he may continue to commit the crime until it becomes increasingly violent.

Let’s be clear about this point of control. A woman is not responsible for keeping a man in control of his own sexual responses. Each man is responsible for his own actions, and, no matter what a woman does, he has no right to any sexual contact with her against her will or without her knowledge.

Dating Rape is not just “he said; she said.” Rape is not just a misunderstanding or the result of a lack of communication. Rape is an act of choice to commit a crime and to forcibly obtain power over another individual through the means of sexual assault.

Dating Rape is not just a misunderstanding. Rape is a criminal act of choosing to overpower a woman and to have sexual intercourse with her without her consent or without her knowledge.


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Jumat, 08 Juni 2012

How To Have Better Dates In 2012

Dating Tips

People want a lot of things in the new year...better jobs, better pay, better bodies...but what about better dates?

Let's face it - meeting a date in person after meeting them online doesn't always go the way we plan. They're too tall, they're too short, they're too young, they're too old, they wore the wrong thing, they have the wrong job, or they're just plain boring...and then we feel obligated to sit through the interminable dinner or cup of coffee with someone we're not interested in out of politeness. Every online dater has had wasted dates, but you don't have to have wasted dates anymore.

Here are four things you can do to have better dates in 2012, even if you don't find yourself doing dinner and a movie with the guy or gal of your dreams:

Stop worrying about whether or not they'll like you. Instead of stressing out over what your date will think of you, ask yourself the opposite question: Will I like my date? That way you won't be trying to read your date's mind, you won't stress out over something that's not in your control anyway, and you'll stay focused on whether or not you want to see your date again, which is what really matters in the long run.

Focus on the positives. You won't click with every person you meet, but that's ok. Enjoy the experience for what it is – a chance to get to know someone new – and focus on the positives. Find three things you genuinely like about the other person, like their sense of style, beautiful eyes, or professional ambition, and compliment them sincerely.

Let go of expectations. Don't let it ruin your day if your date doesn't appear to be your soulmate within ten minutes of meeting them. Relax and open your mind to experiencing whatever happens. Even if you don't want to pursue a romantic relationship with your date, it may turn into something else fruitful like a friendship or a business contact.

Think of it as an opportunity. So your date didn't work out this time, but it was still a valuable learning experience. Practice your conversation skills and think about what you can learn from this experience that might help you choose better dates in the future. What did it teach you about dating? About men and women? About yourself?

 And remember: every date that's wrong for you leads you one step closer to the date that's right for you. Put your head in the right place and 2012 can be a year that's bad-date-free.

Tag: dating

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Senin, 21 Mei 2012

Patience In Relationship

Posted on 01/17/2010

During stressful times in a relationship, the natural inclination is to vent emotions destructively .

Give your partner and your relationship the benefit of the doubt.

Allow a little more time before you react. You lose nothing by being quiet and allowing the madness around you to go its own way.

Rise above it.

Find yourself in all the confusion.

Let your calmness be the island of reasonableness that brings both of you back in balance.

If you go with the turmoil, it will surely get worse.

Expect the situation to improve.

Remember, it takes time to heal.

Look for evidence that there is still good between you.

Nurture it by welcoming the positive feelings that arise.

Let negativity float past you. Do not attract it to you by resisting or holding on to it. Don’t play hurt. Don’t be a container for anger.

Keep your best self company in the face of abuse and accusation

Let the answers come to you.

Decide what is best for you as you listen, but do not react while you are deciding.

Implement your decision in peace.

Be patient.


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Selasa, 08 Mei 2012

What Do Men Want in Your Online Profile?

By Tim Phillips | September 8, 2011

Developing the perfect online profile that attracts men can be a struggle, but if you know the right methods you are on your way to successfully meeting men. When a man is looking through a females profile you’d right away expect them to not want to read, but this is incorrect. A man is more likely to contact you if you take the time to put a longer profile in.

When you go through looking at profiles for other females you may see some have very minimal information and then there are some that have endless information. It has been proven that men are more likely to contact the female with more information then the one with minimal information. It gives them more options of things to say to you, and spike interest in you.

If you have placed some of your interests into your profile don’t just make a long list, actually expand as to why you are interested in them and how you became interested in them. This could spike up some great conversations and give the men a more likely chance of having something in common with you.

Another good thing to include onto your profile is photographs of yourself. Avoid posting photos of you and your ex boyfriend or a male. This could spike jealousy right away and make a man second guess interacting with you. By having multiple photos of yourself a man can get a better visual of you and be more likely to become interested in you. Many men judge a female by their appearance and most females think this is wrong because they are not getting to know your personality, but come on ladies you do it too so give them something to admire you by.

Everyone is very judgemental when you first get to know someone and if you don’t give a man something to become interested in you they won’t. By taking the time to develop a great profile and pretty much advertise yourself as the best thing that could ever happen to them you will find yourself sitting waiting for a long time.

By putting in a little effort you can get great results and find your perfect man. Remember though don’t just settle with anyone, make sure its someone you’ll be happy with and you will find yourself in a great relationship in no time.


View the original article here

Sabtu, 07 April 2012

'Tis The Season For Online Dating

General News

2012 is upon us, and so is an annual rush to join online dating sites in the new year.

It's known as the Holiday Effect - the 15 to 20 percent increase in online daters from December to February. Every year online dating sites experience a surge in membership over the holiday season, as singles who didn't have someone to kiss under the mistletoe or at midnight on New Year's Eve turn to the Internet for a fresh start in the new year.

There are a number of reasons that January has become such a busy month for online dating. New Years resolutions are on everyone's mind, focusing many people’s attention on improving their current relationships or finding a partner if they're single. The idea of making a fresh start for the new year is also a strong motivator that draws traffic to online dating sites, as is the pressure from family and friends to settle down that singles often experience during the holidays.

“There is also the anticipated Valentines Day event which many single people dread more than any other day of the year,” says Penny Russell, a spokesperson for a single parent dating site, “and this often spurs them into action and a determination to seek out a new partner before that day arrives.”

Doree Lewak, author of The Panic Years: A Guide to Surviving Smug Married Friends, Bad Taffeta and Life on the Wrong Side of 25 Without a Ring, believes that the pressure to be attached during this time of year is especially strong on women. “Women still feel huge pressure around the holidays,” she told USA Today, “and certainly exacerbated by New Year's - to have a date. I don't think that moment has passed.”

Dating sites all across the Web experience the Holiday Effect from both men and women, from Match.com who say that their busiest season is December 26 to February 14, to PlentyOfFish.com who report a 15% spike in sign ups and a 20% increase in activity from current users during that period.

And it's not just the dating sites themselves that benefit from the Holiday Effect. As more and more members join the sites, the pool of potential dates increases dramatically, improving everyone's chance of finding love in the new year. Many dating sites respond to this trend by offering special rates around the holiday season, so if you're in the market for a membership take advantage of their holiday gift and start the new year off right.

If you are interested in finding a service to join this year, you should take a look at our list of reviewed dating sites or try our dating site search tool.

Tag: online dating statistics

View the original article here

Sabtu, 28 Januari 2012

Loving Love

Posted on 01/10/2010
Loving Love! Is there any one thing more examined in the human psyche than the emotion of love? Some people are lucky in love: They find the perfect fit in a partner and tend the garden of romance for decades .
Others strike out again and again in affairs of the heart. We obsess over love and we endure bad loves, relationships that damage our egos and leave our self esteem cracked and bleeding. Nevertheless, we continue to seek love despite any emotional scarring. The goal is union, connection, and only love can feed such a hunger.
One theory about love is that it facilitates our basic desire to send our genetic codes into the future. That theory certainly has merit and may well move the tides of love. Once we get caught in the wave, we risk not being able to return to shore without having incurred some damage.
As anthropologists study the evolutionary and familial benefits of falling in love, scientists investigate how love is rooted in the physiology of the body. That’s why we have welcomed the word chemistry into our lexicon of love it implies that a mysterious but wonderful reaction is happening within us.
When we speak of love in terms of chemistry, we describe passionate, distracting, even frightening encounters that can send us over the moon. What can we make of love that ignites instantly? Can we trust our immediate reactions to another person?
Are our bodies equipped at a physical level to help us sort through and analyze our relationships? Should we believe in what Jung called “the ultimate honesty of the body”?
When Michael and Barbara met in the museum, some unknown force sparked a mutual interest in a matter of minutes. Moreover, had it been David instead of Michael in the museum that day, the chemical reaction might not have occurred, and Barbara would have walked onto the next exhibit alone, her life unchanged.
Michael and Barbara relied on a host of sensory cues when they met. For example, he liked the deep brown of her eyes and she was attracted to the sound of his voice. But there was more. As this couple followed the siren call of their attraction, they were subconsciously tuning into important messages provided by the sixth sense.
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Sabtu, 21 Januari 2012

Dating made Easy, Fun and Flirty at easyflirt.com

If you have not dated online, then there is no doubt that easyflirt.com brings a new and refreshing feeling to the idea of online dating. This is an interactive dating site which gives you an opportunity to meet, share, and date with different people. For now, we’ll just go through some of the prominent features of this amazing dating site.
Customer Support

Once you register and experience problems with your account log in or details, you can be assured of getting timely help. There is a moderation team which monitors the quality of content such as pictures. The customer support operates 24/7 which means that whether it’s night or day, you will surely get the help you want for all of your questions and guidance on using this site. The customer support will help you resolve the problems and also enhance the quality of your relationships by ensuring you have better uptime.
Interact without Limits
The greatest gain that you get by registering in easyflirt.com is that you will have unlimited opportunity to date as much and as long as you want. This site transcends the challenge of national and geographic boundaries which means that you can date with people from any region, of all sizes, and different ages. You have access to millions of profiles, and you can contact the persons you are interested in via e-mail, chat, or webcam.

Free Registration and Data Protection
As we’ve seen, easyflirt.com offers some of the best features to help you start building meaningful relationships from people of all walks of life. For all this features and support, you don’t need to pay anything. Membership is free and you don’t have to worry about the security of personal details. Everything is taken care of meticulously so that you can enjoy quality time as your flirt with interested persons.

Multiple languages

Easyflirt.com takes care of the diverse needs of people of different languages. So, if you are multilingual or not proficient in English, you can still date with people who speak French, Italian, German, Spanish, Portuguese, and Dutch. You have access to interested individuals of all walks of life and this will surely enhance the quality of your relationship regardless of your beliefs or values.

Wide Selection of relationships

Easyflirt.com also gives you virtual access to different kinds of relationship based on your preferences. You can contact and chat with gays, lesbians, heterosexuals and other kinds of sexual orientation. By just registering as member, you increase your chances of flirting with new people and building lasting relationships. Well, you can never run short of options here.


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